School holiday is way over but the wedding bells is still ringing...well you can read through all the magazines at the newsstand or at the mamak stall. Preparation for wedding, be it Malay, Chinese, Indian or other. It's time to blend ideas old and new,traditional vs modern, rich and poor, and other element that past through the time. It's time to gather the family, friends and mind you foe. It's time to dream and making it happen...Ah! Wedding just by mentioning it can make everybody smile from ear to ear.
My cousin sisters' wedding is just sound the corner and all in all there are 3 couples getting married. One in July and the other two in August at the eve of school holiday. My mother is trying to keep cool about it as my mother is one of the eldest that plays an important role for the wedding. As for me, now I am my mother right-hand man because I am consider to be eldest as well (no like the one in 'The Charmed' series), because I am married and knows what to do.Well, from my experience, this is what I told all the 3 cousins of mine:
1. Plan your budget and the time length that you want to get married.
2. Be more pro-active and creative
Now that you are getting married, grab your hands on all the wedding books you can. Widen your view, survey every corner of the streets, search high and low for the best quality and prices. You would be suprise that some junk shop (it looks old but it does not sell junky) can give you what you are looking for. It happens to me...so the magic might work for you.The trick is try not to go to the shop where everybody go but maybe go next door because the most popular shop sometimes offer prices higher than market value.Even though, the oil price is rising, that doesn't mean you can't go out, plan your day better if you bring your mum, aunt or elder sister just so you don't go bling!bling!and stay focus. Be creative, it might not be think you want but you can still buy it and improvise and if you the florist or the shop assistant to do it for you, well back to point 1, always,always check your budget.
3. Talk to your spouse to be
You may have spent most of your college life or working life with him, or you may not even know him at all.This is the best time to really get to know each other. This is what I have been through with my hubby, with enough money we have, we plan every weekend to do all the wedding preparation since hubby is still finishing his chambering and have little amount of money. We budgeted and choose only the most important items and with reasonable price. But we are very happy, because we are not throwing our money away. During this time, in between breaks during the shopping, we talk a lot (don't stop talking, that is the most important element in marriage life) about our future saving, investing on insurance, family planning, purchasing a property and things that will shape our life later on. Talk, argue, cry or anything but it does make the love grow stronger you know.Getting to know both sides behaviour, best if you bring a family member so that you can put yourself under control.
4. Be more sensible
As the time is getting nearer, you will start feeling edgy and restless. relax. calm down. it's not worth shouting or tiring yourself over stupid little thing especially with your family and spouse to be. Go for spa, jacuzzi, fitness centre. You can even try playing golf or start your own blog, just to remind you about how edgy it is to face your wedding.Don't let the 'cold feet' syndrome get unto you. Pray a lot, talk to the people who can help you and smile and be happy. Anyway, you have to be and look happy on your wedding day...
5. Be prepare
Ready your mind and soul for the marriage. Read a lot, talk about it. Find out what you want and need to know so you won't be suprise or blur after the wedding ceremony is over. This is the time you can plan and dream how you want your marriage to take shape.Remember, marriage is only between you and your spouse and the others they only come and go in your marriage life.
Well, that it just the tip of the iceberg, most importantly, you yourself must decide what to do and need to do...taking hubby advice, life is to be enjoy and marriage is a bliss...
My cousin sisters' wedding is just sound the corner and all in all there are 3 couples getting married. One in July and the other two in August at the eve of school holiday. My mother is trying to keep cool about it as my mother is one of the eldest that plays an important role for the wedding. As for me, now I am my mother right-hand man because I am consider to be eldest as well (no like the one in 'The Charmed' series), because I am married and knows what to do.Well, from my experience, this is what I told all the 3 cousins of mine:
1. Plan your budget and the time length that you want to get married.
Want to know why? The budget does not only includes during the wedding but also after the wedding. The fun and sensation is before the wedding and during the wedding but you can't go running to your parents' asking for money after the wedding. You are on your own. The longer you plan the best price you can get but I don't advice you to lengthen it for more than one year,things might go awry then...Take points of how you want your wedding to be whether there is a theme, that goes for colour scheme in the bedroom, "pelamin",flowergirl(if u need to), even in the bathroom or the whole house if you have the money and if you plan to have it at home, the caterer, the tent and now most importantly, the wedding planner but this does not mean you have to have one only if you can afford it. Next, the make-up artiste, the wedding dress, the jewellery and to some point the wedding reception, is it at home or hotel or a country club or even in the middle of a football field in front of your house. These are all in the budget and don't forget the small trinkets like gifts for the guests, and for the Malays, trinkets for the family of the groom or bride if you are having a different reception. Trust me you do not want to have unnecessary debt after you are married...starting a new life with debts is not an essential element towards living happily ever after. I don't agree with the trend that you have to apply for a loan either from a bank or any other means in order to get married. It is a responsibility, so one must try hard not to start a family on an unstable condition. Possibly you might want to share the expenses maybe having only one reception for both family and not to ask for a higher dowry than what can be afforded by other party.Keep in mind the wedding is just a program announcing that you are married not some fun fair activities that has to last for a week. Minimize your expenses...Keep aside some of your salary for saving not only for the wedding but also after it...
2. Be more pro-active and creative
Now that you are getting married, grab your hands on all the wedding books you can. Widen your view, survey every corner of the streets, search high and low for the best quality and prices. You would be suprise that some junk shop (it looks old but it does not sell junky) can give you what you are looking for. It happens to me...so the magic might work for you.The trick is try not to go to the shop where everybody go but maybe go next door because the most popular shop sometimes offer prices higher than market value.Even though, the oil price is rising, that doesn't mean you can't go out, plan your day better if you bring your mum, aunt or elder sister just so you don't go bling!bling!and stay focus. Be creative, it might not be think you want but you can still buy it and improvise and if you the florist or the shop assistant to do it for you, well back to point 1, always,always check your budget.
3. Talk to your spouse to be
You may have spent most of your college life or working life with him, or you may not even know him at all.This is the best time to really get to know each other. This is what I have been through with my hubby, with enough money we have, we plan every weekend to do all the wedding preparation since hubby is still finishing his chambering and have little amount of money. We budgeted and choose only the most important items and with reasonable price. But we are very happy, because we are not throwing our money away. During this time, in between breaks during the shopping, we talk a lot (don't stop talking, that is the most important element in marriage life) about our future saving, investing on insurance, family planning, purchasing a property and things that will shape our life later on. Talk, argue, cry or anything but it does make the love grow stronger you know.Getting to know both sides behaviour, best if you bring a family member so that you can put yourself under control.
4. Be more sensible
As the time is getting nearer, you will start feeling edgy and restless. relax. calm down. it's not worth shouting or tiring yourself over stupid little thing especially with your family and spouse to be. Go for spa, jacuzzi, fitness centre. You can even try playing golf or start your own blog, just to remind you about how edgy it is to face your wedding.Don't let the 'cold feet' syndrome get unto you. Pray a lot, talk to the people who can help you and smile and be happy. Anyway, you have to be and look happy on your wedding day...
5. Be prepare
Ready your mind and soul for the marriage. Read a lot, talk about it. Find out what you want and need to know so you won't be suprise or blur after the wedding ceremony is over. This is the time you can plan and dream how you want your marriage to take shape.Remember, marriage is only between you and your spouse and the others they only come and go in your marriage life.
Well, that it just the tip of the iceberg, most importantly, you yourself must decide what to do and need to do...taking hubby advice, life is to be enjoy and marriage is a bliss...
